Meeting Etiquette

Remote meetings are the heartbeat of distributed teams. How you show up, participate, and engage in meetings directly impacts your professional relationships, your perceived value to the team, and ultimately your career success. This isn’t just about attending—it’s about actively contributing.

The Foundation: Setup and Appearance

Before we discuss meeting behavior, ensure you’ve mastered the fundamentals:

Read and implement: Home Office Setup - Your technical setup must be flawless
Read and follow: Dress Code - Present yourself professionally, every single meeting

These are non-negotiable basics. If you haven’t addressed these, do so before worrying about anything else in this guide.

The Critical Importance of Video

Always Keep Your Video On

This is an absolute must. Turning off your video in remote meetings is one of the most common—and most damaging—mistakes remote workers make.

Why Video Matters

Communication is not just words. When you speak, a massive amount of information is communicated through:

Facial expressions
Body language
Eye contact
Reactions and engagement
Energy and presence

When your video is off, all of this disappears. You become a name on a screen, a disembodied voice, or worse—a silent presence that contributes nothing.

The Reality of Video-Off Meetings

Imagine being the speaker in a meeting where you’re the only one with video on. You’re presenting to:

A grid of profile pictures
Black screens with names
Zero facial feedback
No visible reactions

Try it yourself—it’s incredibly awkward. You’re essentially speaking to yourself, with no idea if people are engaged, confused, nodding in agreement, or scrolling through social media.

From experience, we can definitively say: turning off your video is disrespectful to everyone else in the meeting.

When People Think Video Is Optional

Some people rationalize turning video off:

“There are five others in the meeting, they won’t miss me”
“I’m just listening, I don’t need to be on camera”
“My internet is slow” (but somehow fine for audio?)
“I’m not presenting, so I don’t need video”

These are all excuses, not reasons. Every single one demonstrates a lack of respect for your colleagues and the meeting itself.

The Professional Standard

Video on = You’re present, engaged, and professional.

Even when you’re not speaking, your video communicates:

You’re paying attention
You’re engaged with the content
You respect the speaker
You’re available to contribute
You’re part of the team

Your facial expressions and body language—a nod of agreement, a thoughtful look, leaning in when interested—these tell the speaker they’re being heard and understood.

The Participation Problem

The Silent Meeting Syndrome

One of the biggest issues in remote meetings is the tendency to join, sit silently, and contribute nothing unless directly asked. This is particularly common among technical professionals.

The scenario looks like this:

Meeting starts
One person speaks (often the organizer or manager)
Everyone else stays silent
No questions asked
No feedback given
No engagement shown
Meeting ends

This isn’t a meeting—it’s a monologue. And it sends terrible messages about you.

Why People Stay Silent

There are many reasons people don’t participate:

Shyness or introversion
Fear of saying something wrong
Thinking someone else will speak up
Not feeling confident enough
Waiting to be called on specifically
Cultural norms around speaking up
Simply not being used to remote meetings

None of these are valid excuses in a professional remote work environment.

What Silence Communicates

When you consistently stay silent in meetings, here’s what others perceive:

❌ You’re not engaged or interested
❌ You have nothing to contribute
❌ You don’t understand the topic
❌ You’re not paying attention
❌ You don’t care about the team or project
❌ You’re not leadership material
❌ You’re not taking ownership

Even if you know exactly what’s being discussed, staying silent makes you invisible. Your knowledge, expertise, and value become irrelevant if nobody ever hears them.

The Goal: Dialogue and Discussion, Not Monologue

Every meeting should be a conversation. Remote meetings work best when they’re:

Interactive and collaborative
Multi-directional, not top-down
Engaging and dynamic
Focused on problem-solving together

Your job is to help create that environment through active participation.

How to Participate Effectively

1. Come Prepared

Never attend a meeting unprepared. This is disrespectful to everyone’s time.

Before every meeting:

Read the agenda (if provided)
Review relevant materials or documents
Understand the meeting’s purpose and goals
Prepare questions or points you want to raise
Have relevant information ready to share
If presenting, prepare slides or demos in advance

If the meeting has a predefined topic or you’re expected to present: Create a simple presentation with a few slides. Even if it’s just 3-4 slides with bullet points, a visual presentation makes communication 10x more effective in remote settings.

2. Be On Time

Punctuality shows respect. In remote work, being late is even more disruptive than in-person because everyone is staring at a screen waiting for you.

Best practices:

Join 1-2 minutes early
Ensure your setup is ready before the start time
If you’re running late, message the team immediately
Never join more than 2-3 minutes late without prior notice

Being consistently late tells your team you don’t value their time.

3. Speak Up and Contribute

Make it a habit to contribute in every meeting. Even if it’s small, say something:

Ways to contribute:

Ask clarifying questions
Share your perspective or insights
Offer suggestions or ideas
Provide updates when relevant
Give feedback on proposals
Acknowledge good points others make
Challenge assumptions constructively
Share relevant examples or experiences

You don’t need to dominate the conversation—but you should be heard. Silence is not an option.

This is critical in remote work. In an office, you naturally walk over to someone’s desk to show them something. In remote work, screen sharing is your equivalent.

Talking about something ≠ Showing something.

When you share your screen and demonstrate:

Communication becomes dramatically clearer
Misunderstandings are immediately resolved
Complex concepts become simple
People can see exactly what you mean
Engagement increases significantly
Meetings become more productive

Whenever possible. Specifically:

Presenting ideas - Show slides, diagrams, or visuals
Demonstrating work - Show your code, designs, or progress
Explaining problems - Walk through the issue visually
Giving updates - Show the actual work, not just describe it
Reviewing documents - Walk through them together
Debugging together - Let people see what you see
Teaching or training - Demonstrate step-by-step

Make screen sharing your default mode of communication. Don’t just talk about things—show people.

5. Use Visuals and Demos

Prepare demos whenever possible. Nothing communicates progress, capability, and professionalism like a working demonstration.

For technical meetings:

Show working code or features
Walk through architecture diagrams
Demonstrate functionality live
Show before/after comparisons
Display data, metrics, or results

For non-technical meetings:

Use simple slides with key points
Show documents or plans visually
Use diagrams or flowcharts
Display timelines or roadmaps

Visual communication reduces barriers significantly and leads to better meeting outcomes.

6. Engage with Active Listening

Even when you’re not speaking, show you’re engaged:

Nod when you agree
Look at the camera when someone is speaking
Use reactions (👍 in Zoom, etc.) when appropriate
Take visible notes - people can tell when you’re engaged
Lean in when something interests you
Show expressions - confused? Interested? Surprised? Let it show

Your video should demonstrate active participation even when silent.

Meeting Best Practices

Before the Meeting

✅ Review agenda and materials
✅ Prepare any content you need to present
✅ Test your audio, video, and internet
✅ Have relevant documents or screens ready
✅ Join 1-2 minutes early
✅ Silence notifications and distractions

During the Meeting

✅ Keep your video on at all times
✅ Stay focused and engaged
✅ Contribute actively (speak up!)
✅ Share your screen to demonstrate
✅ Ask questions when unclear
✅ Take notes on action items
✅ Acknowledge others' contributions
✅ Be mindful of time

After the Meeting

✅ Follow up on action items immediately
✅ Send any promised information promptly
✅ Clarify anything you didn't understand
✅ Update relevant documents or systems

When You Can’t Attend

Be Proactive and Communicate Early

In rare situations where you cannot attend a scheduled meeting:

Inform the team as early as possible - Don’t wait until the last minute
Message the organizer directly - Explain the situation
Provide context - Brief reason (you don’t need to over-explain)
Offer alternatives - Can you join late? Can you review notes after?
Catch up afterward - Read meeting notes, watch recording, ask for summary
Follow up on action items - Ensure you’re not blocking anyone

Proactive communication shows responsibility. Last-minute no-shows or silent absences show the opposite.

Common Meeting Mistakes to Avoid

Video and Presence Mistakes

❌ Turning off your video (unless absolutely necessary)
❌ Joining with poor audio or video quality
❌ Looking at your phone or other screens
❌ Eating or drinking visibly during meetings
❌ Having distracting backgrounds or lighting

Participation Mistakes

❌ Staying silent the entire meeting
❌ Only speaking when directly asked
❌ Not asking questions when confused
❌ Talking about things without showing them
❌ Not sharing your screen when demonstrating

Preparation Mistakes

❌ Arriving unprepared or without materials
❌ Not reading the agenda beforehand
❌ Being late without notice
❌ Not having your content ready to share
❌ Technical issues due to lack of testing

Communication Mistakes

❌ Interrupting or talking over others
❌ Going off-topic or rambling
❌ Not muting when there's background noise
❌ Multitasking visibly during meetings
❌ Not following up on action items

The Bottom Line

Meetings in remote work are where relationships are built, value is demonstrated, and careers are advanced.

Every meeting is an opportunity to:

Show your expertise and knowledge
Demonstrate engagement and commitment
Build rapport with your team
Prove your communication skills
Establish yourself as a valuable contributor

How you show up in meetings directly impacts how you’re perceived professionally.

The Professional Remote Worker

A professional remote worker:

Always has video on - Shows respect and presence
Participates actively - Contributes ideas, asks questions, engages
Comes prepared - Reviews materials, prepares content, is ready
Shares screen frequently - Shows rather than tells
Demonstrates work - Uses visuals, demos, and presentations
Is punctual - Respects others’ time
Follows up - Completes action items and communicates proactively

This is the standard. Anything less signals you’re not serious about remote work.

Take Action Today

Evaluate your meeting behavior honestly:

Do you always keep your video on?
Do you contribute in every meeting?
Do you share your screen to demonstrate things?
Do you come prepared with slides or demos?
Are you proactive in communication?

If you answered “no” to any of these, commit to changing today. Your career in remote work depends on it.

Remember: In remote work, meetings are your primary visibility. Make every meeting count by showing up fully—video on, engaged, prepared, and ready to contribute. This is how you build a reputation as a valuable, professional team member.